Modestine

by Jefferson Fox

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about

These songs and I have struggled to understand one another's needs for quite some time now. Many were recorded numerous times over a period of years. Modestine is the result of our compromises and growth. The album made itself a record about broken souls. I didn't mean for that to be the case...but I often don't mean for things to turn out the way they do. I hope you find some enjoyment in the collection.

credits

released August 1, 2018

Jefferson Fox - Vocals, all instruments ***, Recording, Mixing, Mastering
Zoe Fox- Backing vocals on Burn The Ground and Jesus and Johnny Cash
Joe Ayoub - Upright Bass on Jesus and Johnny Cash ***
Sharon Fox - Producer, assistant Mastering Engineer
Recorded at Freak Show Studio in Jackson Missouri
All songs written by Jefferson Fox
Ursidae Records 2018

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Jefferson Fox Jackson

I'm writing my own bio... I'm too old for this shit. - jefferson fox

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Track Name: Jesus and Johnny Cash
From this make-shift motel
I used to call home
a level of Hell
full of All alone
I broadcast a mayday
to the Heavens with a phonograph

A dirty needle in a crooked arm
spin the Forty Five
Rhythm, a necromancers charm
to bring himself back to life

Dying slow from living fast
It's just me and Jesus
and Johnny Cash

the phone it won't ring
no matter how you stare
I call out to angels
who are not there
I search for a cause that I could
call myself a Martyr

the J.C.'s they sing their songs
and tell each other stories
about the women they deny knowing
and the Unwanted Glory
you're walkin a line unless you're
walking on the water

Dying slow from living fast
It's just me and Jesus
and Johnny Cash

Me and the Boys
we stay up all night
drinkin whiskey and water, and wine
and the white light
it wont make it's way out of that
busted, old television

the picture is fuzzy
but all Three of us know
The Good Book, a Drink and
the Radio
will take away the madness
even if it don't take you
where you're wishing

From this make-shift motel
I used to call home
a level of Hell
full of All alone
I broadcast a mayday
to the Heavens with a phonograph

A dirty needle in a crooked arm
spin the Forty Five
Rhythm, a necromancers charm
to bring himself back to life

Dying slow from living too fast
It's just me and Jesus
and Johnny Cash
Track Name: Neighbors
what the neighbors must say
bout the slammin of doors
the silent treatment and
the screaming of course
gravel in the air as she speeds away
what the neighbors must say
the neighbors must say

the Joneses and the Walters they have
they've seen it all before
their closest neighbor is the oldest child
in the bedroom right next door

in behind a wave and a smile
their eyes give them away
no hope left and I can only guess
what the neighbors must say
the neighbors must say

and he's considered taking his life
but who would be left to pray
for his child or for his poor wife
what the neighbors must say

what the neighbors must say about the
fear and the lies
the sarcasm in their angry goodbyes
the state of a union gone separate ways
what the neighbors must say
the neighbors must say

and he's considered taking his life
but who would be left to pray
for his child or for his poor wife
what the neighbors must say

I've considered taking my life
but who would be left to pray
for my child or for my poor wife
what the neighbors
must say
Track Name: Strange Language
There's nobody home in this house
a monument to the days we shared
colors of the lives we picked out
little trinkets everywhere

the photos of your face in
the places we stayed they're all
more beautiful for you
and the flowers call me home when you're away
the same we you used to

and i wish i had been a better lover for you
i wish you could believe the words i say
but the stranger i turned into he
stole away my language
and in translation things get lost along the way
along the way

there''s a box of jewelry on a stand by the bed
full of things that sparkle on your skin
but you burn so bright i have to turn my head
i never see any of them

and the treasures we brought back from foreign shores
i know now what they are
the remedies to troubles that lay
outside our door
and my hope that you don't go too far

and i wish i had been a better lover for you
i wish you could believe the words i say
but the stranger i turned into he
stole away my language
and in translation things get lost along the way
along the way

alone is a sad, a sad place to be
not quite as bad as keeping the wrong company
so i'll write you another love song
in this strange language of mine
and pray you understand
even though i know you won't belive
Track Name: My Girl
when the wind takes the clatter of the trees
and the cold takes the green from the world
and I'm all gone except in stories and songs
you will still be my girl

when a laugh comes between
a tear and a scream
in slow motion a dancing dress it twirls
alone with memories and
broken old dreams
you will, you'll still be my girl
you'll still be my girl

when the Earth stops turning
and the music dies
like some broken, old Tilt-A-Whirl
and I've left town with some
intergalactic carnival
you will, you'll still be my girl
you'll still be my girl

when you curse my name
and you set fire
to the photos when you
smash your pearls
when the flowers all die
and the angels cry
you'll still be my girl

cause I loved you when
the summer children they played
I loved you before your
fist ever curled
and you won't miss me and
you'll never kiss me but
you will, you'll still be my girl
you'll still be my girl

when this only exists in my little mind
when it's just a vision out on the hot
highway oil
when the Sirens drag me
into the Sea
you will
you'll still be my Girl
Track Name: Shady Acres
when we're all gone the subdivisions
they'll turn back into their titles
when we're gone the land it'll
stake it's own claim
when we're all gone the animals
they'll have their own houses
and this old world will laugh as
she forgets our names

when we're all gone the coyotes
they'll be sleeping on sofas
when we're gone the bees will build
their hives in Cadillacs
and the monkeys will sleep on satin
and the high-rises in Manhattan
they'll be hundred story high...rabbitat
when we're gone

when there's no one left to sit on our asses
and ride around on gas engines
and mow the pretty grasses
the birds will sing as the time it passes
when we are all gone

when we're all gone the concrete will be
eaten by the weeds
when we're all gone the oceans
will be free of our disease
when we're all gone the planet
she'll get back up off her knees
and breathe, and breathe

when we're gone the ants
will take the grocery stores
when we're all gone
there won't be any rich or any poor
and the rats will make nests
in the Italian handbags of the whores
who entertained the politicians
that brought us poverty and war

when we're gone our good intentions
they won't even make a sound
when all the reasons that we needed them
come crashing to the ground
when we're gone we won't be missed
no one to hope that we come back
there'll be no proof that we existed
except for plastic and Big Macs
when we're all gone

when there's no one left to sit on our asses
and ride around on gas engines
and mow the fuckin grass, well
the birds will sing as the time it passes
when we are all gone
Track Name: The Code
a dead man woke from slumber today
from the dream that stole his rest away
into a world screaming
empty of any life he had known

doors were locked and nobody talked
they just stared into Code in their palms as they walked
mothers were cold
and children born grown

he found religion to cling to for awhile
he prayed to his God for just a smile
or a hand to still his trembling
he prayed for purpose

But he'd lost his way and his hope
and his mind
he'd lost the memory of what
he'd hoped to find
he had lost himself when he ran off
and he joined their circus

He did his tricks and he served His time
mixed potions up of his own design
to cast out the Devils
but they just filled him up instead

so the branded the code into the palm of his hand
the wandering and the Magic Sleep it began
and he stumbled off into the land
the Land of the Living Dead

the cycle complete now
the computers could eat
and the programmers died because
they failed to believe it
once consumed by The Code
the subject had nothing to offer

it was the World you see
not the Programmers at all
She wanted us gone
twisted our minds down small
so we'd hand The Code off to our sons
and our daughters

your sons and my daughters

my daughters
my daughters
Track Name: Hold Up The Bottle
Steady the room
and give me just a minute
to get my feet back under this old body
and some spirits in it

I can't move my arms
I can just barely see
would you hold up the bottle
for me

there's a place down in Texas
I call 'Beggars Mill'
where she tore out my heart
Hell it might be up there still
but she's in love in Birmingham
as far as I know
and me, I've become the scourge of this Border town
down in Old Mexico

So hold up the bottle for me
put it to my lips and put me out of my, my misery
If I could black out right about now
I feel like the emptiness it might leave
would you hold up the bottle for me

for me

I've got a picture of you
from back before
it's tucked away in that old Bible of mine
I don't read much anymore

I keep em both in the liquor cabinet
in case I ever do need your help
it gets hard to pour that last one
all by myself

So hold up the bottle for me
put it to my lips and put me out of my, my misery
If I could black out right about now
I feel like the emptiness it might leave
would you hold up the bottle
hold up the bottle
Oh hold up that bottle for me
Track Name: Burn The Ground
Its a long, long way to Louisville and a
hard way to go
she found out about you and now
everybody knows

you better take a plane
'cause you burned every bridge between here...
here and home

and the medicine you've been taking
it just won't matter
cause in your blood
there is still proof
you can burn the ground around
where the sick ones, they gather
but there is no cure for the truth

if it's a fever you've been fighting
you've always taken the whiskey
for swallowing your pride you might try a beer
if it don't get any worse than this then
by all means, cigarettes man
but what you gonna do if she reappears?

because the medicine you've been taking
it just won't matter
cause in your blood
there is still proof
you can burn the ground around
where the sick ones, they gather
but there is no cure for the truth

Its a long, long way to Louisville and a
hard way to go
she found out about you and now
everybody knows

you better take a plane
'cause you burned every bridge between here...
here and home
Track Name: Goodbye
day after day
weeks of walkin circles
the siblings and their kids
research and the uncomfortable silence
not quite as bad as talkin bout it

and when people get scared
they hold each others hands
you held mine cause you thought i was stronger
than i really am

but if I hadn't done it
someone else would have
if I hadn't done someone would have lied
if I hadn't done it someone else
would have ruined your Goodbye

there's a lot of talk about time
a lot of talk about dreams
a lot of whispering and shouting
as we come apart at the seams

maybe the Winter will wipe us clean
maybe the dirt will grow over by Spring
maybe we'll unsee all we've seen
undream all we've been

it breaks my heart that your last words
were "I don't want to die"
a sad phrase to try to take the place
of what should have been "Goodbye"

and I swore we would talk again
cause that's the kind of lie
we tell around here
I looked you right in the eye

but if I hadn't done it
someone else would have
if I hadn't done someone would have lied
if I hadn't done it someone else
would have ruined your Goodbye

if I hadn't done it
someone else would have
if I hadn't done someone would have lied
if I hadn't done it someone else
would have told you
you were going to be fine

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